Sex is a beautiful thing. Just as every other thing that was designed by Master designer. It was designed for procreation purposes and also happens to be pleasurable in the process (talk about what God won't do to make us happy).
The idea of seeing two people come together through such a powerful and spiritual manner to create life remains a mystery we will never comprehend. However, in spite of all this glorification, having sex still has its consequences. I'm not preaching whether it's right or wrong. Or whether you should, or shouldn't have it. That's remains your decision since you have the right to free will. This is for those who do not want to engage in sex whether it is teens who are too young, or men and women who'd rather not, or the reasoning is for religious beliefs. Sometimes it's not even about not having sex eventually but Sometimes if it happens too fast, then there is a chance that is what the relationship will just be about.
I actually believe it can potentially be bad to have sex too soon, if you are really serious about your partner. I can't say that is for certain. I know that doesn't sound like a real manly thing to say either. Everyone wants sex, or likes it. Women do, obviously guys do as well. Outside those physical urges we all get, sometimes it's not always the right time for sex and being human (with a body no be wood mentality)it's not always easy to control them.
However, if you are really serious about it here are stop steps I'm sure might help.
1. Avoid being alone during possible sexual situations. For instance if the two of you are in a house, or apartment all alone. This is a very easy way for sexual tension to increase quite fast (especially if you two are attracted to each other) then you start to kiss and quickly and we know how that usually ends. I know the two of you need alone time, some of the time. You can go about it in some other way like going to see a movie and creating fun things you can both enjoy without feeling sorry for it or generally avoid doing things that increase the chance of it escalating into sex. I guess this step is pretty difficult but it's in all of us to achieve whatever we set our minds to.
2. Think about something that's a total turn off. If you feel the urge is really coming, think about the most unattractive thing possible to help block off such thoughts. The main objective here is to help get your mind engaged as constructively as possible.
3. Talk to your partner. Tell him or her what your beliefs are and what you want. If they truly care about you and want to be with you, they'd understand. Don't feel guilty, or allow them to make you feel bad for not pleasing their pleasures. You shouldn't be entitled to do something that you aren't sure or ready for. If they can't understand this, then you have to wonder if they are who you thought they were and if you ought to be with them. Remember your belief and ideals are what make up your existence and where you don't see eye to eye with your partner on such issues then I need not say more.
4. Avoid peer pressure from others. It's very easy for both of the couples in the relationship to feel they aren't ready, and have friends pressure them into it. I never understood this, especially for a guys sake. When other men look down at it as wimpy, or not "manly" if a guy doesn't engage in sex. To me that just tells you how insecure they are in reality. Where they have to hide that with the macho sex talk. It's extremely easy for all of us to have sex (besides sex in itself is not a sin, it's who you have it with that makes it a sin). For some it is some big mission in life. Everyone does it eventually, how else are there so many of us popping up everywhere? So ignore those people, if you must.
5. Work together. There's no better feeling than knowing you are with someone that shares the same ideals with you. Though there are some exceptions to the rule because I've seen and heard of people who were heavily influenced by their partners and turned around for good. Still it is important to know that both of you are working for each others spiritual development because true religion is not immoral.
If you are not ready to start having sex or want to save it for marriage, then you might have to wait a while before you can find a partner cos it's becoming more difficult to find Ur kind of people these days even amongst devoted Christians (yes even them too). They are the worst hit, some saying one thing and doing another whilst some are embracing it with outstretched arms. But not to worry, as long as it's your life your talking about, that's all that really counts.
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